Real photos. Made-up news. Written by Margaret.
WELCOME BAY MALL SANTA ACCUSED OF UPSELLING PHOTO PACKAGES TO CRYING TODDLERS
Retail Ruckus Welcome Bay
PICTON ROAD CONES NOW OUTNUMBER RESIDENTS TWO TO ONE — MARLBOROUGH DISTRICT COUNCIL "COMFORTABLE WITH THE RATIO"
Council Chaos Picton
GATE PA PRIMARY BANS GLITTER AFTER INCIDENT STAFF DESCRIBE AS "BIBLICAL"
School Gate Gate Pa
Suburban Crime
More →- PONSONBY PETITION TO BAN LEAF BLOWERS BEFORE 10AM SUNDAY — BLOKE DOING THE BLOWING HAS ALSO SIGNED IT Ponsonby
- GREYTOWN CAT CAUGHT OPENING NEIGHBOUR'S GARAGE DOOR ON CAMERA — INSTALLER SAYS DOOR IS "WORKING PERFECTLY" Greytown
- CASTLECLIFF WHEELIE-BIN LID LEFT OPEN OVERNIGHT — RESIDENTS DEMAND ANSWERS Castlecliff
- RICCARTON STREET CONVENES TRIBUNAL OVER UTE BLOCKING THREE DRIVEWAYS — VERDICT PENDING, UTE ALSO PENDING Riccarton
- WINTON WOMAN CALLS 111 ON COURIER FOR BEING "TOO NICE" Winton
- RUAKURA WHEELIE BINS FOUND FACING WRONG WAY — RESIDENT ESCALATES TO WATCH COMMITTEE Ruakura
Council Chaos
More →- ALEXANDRA PUBLIC LOOS SHUT FOR "WELLNESS REFURBISHMENT" — NOBODY KNOWS WHAT THAT MEANS Alexandra
- MOUNT MAUNGANUI MEETING ON $140,000 BRONZE PIGEON ENDS WITH RETIREE ESCORTED FROM HALL Mount Maunganui
- ROYAL COMMISSION OF INQUIRY INTO JOHNSONVILLE CAMELLIA DELIVERS 340-PAGE FINDINGS Johnsonville
- LEVIN RATEPAYERS FORK OUT $84K FOR REPORT CONCLUDING REPORTS ARE UNDERFUNDED Levin
- TAURANGA COUNCIL INSTALLS EV CHARGERS ON MATUA VERGE WHERE NO CAR HAS EVER PARKED Matua
- SOCKBURN PLAYGROUND SHUT FOUR MONTHS FOR "ASPIRATIONAL MAINTENANCE", COUNCIL WON'T SAY WHAT THAT IS Sockburn
Tradie Tales
More →- WESTSHORE ROOFERS DOWN TOOLS EVERY TIME A PLANE GOES OVER — "SAFETY", APPARENTLY Westshore
- BROCKVILLE RETAINING WALL HELD UP BY NO. 8 WIRE, FOUR FENCE POSTS AND ONE BLOKE'S GOOD FEELING Brockville
- HOKITIKA BUILDER DECLARES DECK "FINISHED EXCEPT FOR THE FINISHING" — FINISHING INCLUDES THE STAIRS Hokitika
- OHAUITI DECK JOB 'DONE TUESDAY' ENTERS THIRD CALENDAR YEAR, AUCKLAND SPARKY BLAMES 'TRAFFIC' Ohauiti
- FITZROY BUILDER INSISTS FIST-SIZED HOLE IN ROOF IS "VENTILATION, BRO" Fitzroy
- AUCKLAND APPRENTICE, 17, SPENT SIX HOURS LOOKING FOR TARTAN PAINT — LADS ON SITE 'GENUINELY IMPRESSED' Taupo
Retail Ruckus
More →- CONSTABLE PEARCE POSTS APOLOGY VIDEO OVER ROTORUA BUNNINGS ONION INCIDENT — ONIONS "REMAIN IN CUSTODY" Ngongotaha
- DUNEDIN SUPERMARKET TROLLEY TURNS UP IN HEATHCOTE RIVER, 360KM FROM HOME St Martins
- GUYS. I NEVER THOUGHT I'D HAVE TO MAKE THIS ARTICLE ABOUT A SMOKING BARBECUE New Brighton
- RICHMOND WOOLWORTHS SELF-CHECKOUT ASKS CUSTOMER IF SHE'S "OKAY" AFTER FAILING TO SCAN A CUCUMBER Richmond
- GUYS. I NEVER THOUGHT I'D HAVE TO MAKE THIS ARTICLE: TE ANAU WOMAN'S ONE GRAPE ARRIVES IN FRIDGE-SIZED BOX Te Anau
- KMART HAMILTON'S 'TREASURE HUNT' PROMOTION IS JUST STAFF ASKING CUSTOMERS WHERE THINGS ARE Gore
School Gate
More →- QUEENWOOD SCHOOL-RUN UTE NOW FLYING MORE FLAGS THAN THE BEEHIVE ON A GOOD DAY Queenwood
- TE PUKE NETBALL MUM CALLS MEETING TO DECIDE WHEN THE MEETINGS ARE Te Puke
- PARNELL SCHOOL APOLOGISES FOR SPELLING "SAUSAGE SIZZLE" AS "SAUSAGE SIZZLE" Parnell
- SOUTH DUNEDIN MUFTI DAY RAISES $47.20 AND ONE VERY SERIOUS QUESTION ABOUT WHOSE HOODIE THAT IS South Dunedin
- ST ANDREWS MUM BRINGS MEASURING TAPE TO SCHOOL PICKUP AND WON'T LET IT GO St Andrews
- HUNTLY MUM DEPLOYS MEASURING TAPE AT SCHOOL GATE, DEMANDS ZONE REDRAWN BY 3.15PM Huntly
Sports Sideline
More →- DOG HOLDS FEILDING CRICKET MATCH TO RANSOM, DECLINES TO NAME PRICE Feilding
- GLADSTONE NETBALL DAD FILMS UMPIRE, 14, "FOR THE TRIBUNAL" — THERE IS NO TRIBUNAL Gladstone
- TAUPO UNDER-11s RUGBY GAME DELAYED 22 MINUTES OVER ORANGE ROSTER DISPUTE Taupo
- PAKURANGA HOCKEY DAD BRINGS MEGAPHONE TO UNDER-12 GAME, USES IT Pakuranga
- FRANKTON UNDER-11 BBQ EVACUATES QUEENSTOWN LIBRARY, REF STILL BLAMED Frankton
- ROYAL COMMISSION FINDS MAKETU CLUBROOMS SMELL OF 'DEEP HEAT AND REGRET', RECOMMENDS EXTRACTOR FAN Maketu
Weather Watch
More →- PAPANUI DROUGHT DECLARED OVER AFTER WOMAN FINDS DRIZZLE ON WINDSCREEN Papanui
- GLENHOLME MAN HOSES DRIVEWAY EVERY NIGHT OF HOSE BAN — SAYS IT'S "FOR MORALE" Glenholme
- MARCHWIEL WOMAN'S HAIR DECLARED PUBLIC SAFETY ISSUE AS TIMARU SEA FOG REFUSES TO LEAVE Marchwiel
- MOUNT EDEN WOMAN DRIVES THREE HOURS TO PAPAMOA FOR ONE SUNNY TUESDAY, COMES BACK THE COLOUR OF A ROAD CONE Mount Eden
- MERIVALE WEATHER APP INSISTS IT'S SUNNY WHILE ANTARCTICA VISIBLY APPROACHES FROM THE SOUTH Merivale
- NORTH DUNEDIN BRACES FOR SNOW THAT HAS NEVER, IN RECORDED HISTORY, ACTUALLY ARRIVED North Dunedin
Community Quirks
More →- FOXTON PLUMBER'S KEY CHANGE ENDS ROSLYN KARAOKE NIGHT AFTER 11 YEARS Foxton
- WADESTOWN MAN OPENS FOUND OBJECT MUSEUM WITH ONE HUBCAP IN IT Wadestown
- TAHUNANUI GNOME MISSING FOUR DAYS — NEIGHBOURLY HAS 140 THEORIES AND ZERO GNOMES Tahunanui
- Little Investigator Calls for Action Over Wanaka's Slanted Landmarks Wanaka
- HOON HAY MAN FURIOUS PONSONBY CAT ELECTED MAYOR BEFORE HIS OWN COUNCIL FIXES THE BLOODY FOOTPATH Hoon Hay
- LINWOOD SCARECROW NAMED BEST DRESSED AT AWARDS NIGHT THAT DIDN'T HAPPEN Merivale
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